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1. Sometimes Amber likes to put on a moustache and walk around looking like a man who some of you may know as Lloyd. Perhaps some of you also know that Amber has D cup boobs, and let me tell you, there is nothing like that rare combination of boob action and moustache that makes one want to grind to a george michael/robert palmer dance remix.

2. the show at sangha sucked. there, we said it. the only good thing we got out of it was Amber biting Dawn's tender ass on stage in front of 20 horrified parents. IF BITING HER ASS AND STICKING MY HEAD IN HER HOLIEST OF HOLIES IS WHAT YOU GET AT AN ALL-AGES SHOW, WAIT AND SEE WHAT YOU GET AT A 21+ SHOW!

3. the shameless display of ass-kissing we will grace our fellow performers SOME Brave Apollo, being that we spelled their name wrong on our goddamn fliers.

4. The subsequent ass-kicking of Some Brave Apollo, in the event that they don't react kindly to our ass-kissing.

5. SPOT LLOYD's BITCH contest. Free T-Shirt to the winner. If they're cute.

so if you haven't already, friend lloyd, friend la gorda, and then get your beautiful booty down to dc9 on sunday. the mothership awaits...
23rd-Jan-2006 06:31 pm - We're back from the dead....
...and have new shows!!!

January 28, Saturday - Sangha
714 West Moreland Avenue Takoma Park, MD 20912
ALL AGES, $5.  Doors at 7.
With: Vilde Fiero, Dirty Little Heaters, Satan's Boys and Girls Club

February 12, Sunday - DC Nine
1940 9th Street NW Washington, DC 20001
21+, $7, Doors at 8.
With: Headstraight</td>

And now for the Bad News: Amber Gorda will be leaving us in May to move to Ohio, of all places. The break is amicable and we fully support her decision to go, but she will be greatly missed. If you look really hard you might even see Dawn getting misty-eyed.

We're looking to make the most of the next few months that she'll still be around, and are set on continuing our little band and reverting to our original format as a three piece when she goes.  Why not get another guitarist, you may ask? 

Because Amber's shoes are that fuckin' big, bitch.
10th-Oct-2005 01:41 pm - Well I'll be hornswaggled.
God damn if it isn't October already.

We've been seemingly awol lately, but lots of things have been going beneath the surface, the biggest of which being the completion of our new demo, and our upcoming show at Ladyfest NC.  *grins*

So take a listen, and be sure to come with me for fun in my boggy.

That is all. Carry on.
6th-Jul-2005 12:16 pm - slap your face with my baloney
The show was an absolute blast, and we offer much thanks to the Velvet Lounge, our promdates Marsha Bradee (who were too too hot in their suits), Marianne Pillsbury and T. Griffin Coraline.
A good time was had by all, especially the random dude wandering around the club in shades with an acoustic guitar and attempting to jam along with the bands onstage from within the audience, completely oblivious to the fact that a. he wasn't in any of the bands, b. he wasn't plugged in so you couldn't hear him, and c. when you could hear him it was apparent that he was sorely out of tune.

I want some of what he had. Or maybe not. :-o

So now what? We're working on recording some songs so that we can *finally* have a new EP to pass around, and working on quite a bit of new material, that has us (well me, anyway) a bit a-flutter. Last night, while working on a new song, obstinate jammer amber_gorda consciously wrote her solo for the first time in her brief la gorda history, and it shall henceforth be called the Take It All Bitch solo. Yay for skillz.

In the meantime, get yer Gorda fix by checking out our gallery for the new pics. I heart cable modem.
This Saturday at the Velvet Lounge, suckas. Be there.

So we've developed this habit of humping one another randomly. It started off with Amber or myself humping a bemused Christine unexpectedly at inappropriate times, sometimes simultaneously, like when she's standing in line to get herself a coffee at the WAWA. We occassionally hump each other on stage as part of the whole Rockstar getting into the music pretense, etc etc.

Originally the humping served the purpose of providing 3/4ths of the band with amusement at the expense of the last person's dignity, usually Christine's coz she looks so darn cute when she's flustered.

But over time the message communicated by humping expanded, foraying into an appropriate method of displaying of affection, camraderie, and even comfort and solace: One practice, Amber was seated on the floor, upset and crying about some issues pertaining to her non-band life. Upon seeing her tears, Ms. Marcia squatted down behind her, put her arms around her shoulders and started thrusting her skinny little pelvis into the back of Amber's head. Given that Amber stopped crying and started laughing, I'd say it was effective.

While in NC, the thought came to us: Do other bands hump each other the way we do? Is this a band thing, or a La Gorda thing?

Our first reaction was that surely other bands must hump each other; Since then conversations with other musicians in bands have proved otherwise. One such friend of mine even said: "That's weird. Cool, but weird."

What, dear reader, do you think?
14th-Jun-2005 09:49 am - Tour stories and other such nonsense.
So, yes, this is really delayed, but I'm a busy girl, what can I say?

NC was a motherfucking blast, despite starting off rather terribly.Collapse ) Saturday night's show was amazing, one of the top three shows we've ever played, and certainly the best one we've played since Amber came into our midst. The crowd was awesome, the sound was great, the other bands were smokin, and we can't say enough nice things about the people we met.

The trip back was much better than the trip down... At some point along I-85 (I believe the town was called Handover, around exit 212) Christine and I stopped off for some succulent pork at this place called Gary's Barbeque and Seafood... We walked in there and it wall to wall small town NC in their sunday best. We sat down and had some yummy barbecue, while vegetarian amber and non-pork-eating Marcia opted to go across the street to the Cracker Barrel for some pancakes. Afterwards Amber introduced us to her alter-ego Lloyd Nards, who made many advances on a vaguely disgusted Christine, much to everyone's amusement.

Now we've been back home for a little over a week... we're working on recording a new demo and preparing for our next show on the 25th with Marsha Bradee and Marianne Pillsbury. We're gonna rock it. Check out this nifty flyer I done made:

I heart photoshop.

We had practice earlier today in preparation for the upcoming show in NC. Was a pretty good day, save some drama surrounding a mummified mouse and its decaptated friend, a spider and other such creepy crawlies that inhabit my basement. After a couple beers Christine put her shades on to act as a sort of visual filter so she wasn't spooked into thinking the balls of dryer line were more critters.

I'm now I'm sitting here at Amber Gorda's apartment-for-not-much-longer, listening to Amber and her friend chit chat about various things that have changed since they left WV. Like the new no-smoking policy at pancake house.

Before her friend got here I was arguing with a dumb-ass from u-haul who told me that he was incapable of transferring me to anyone else. Apparently the U-haul customer service buck stops with Jose Fontes. A pox on your penis, Jose. I hope it falls of after tagging you in the eye.
18th-Mar-2005 01:49 am - HAHAHA

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